Tuesday, January 29, 2008

How's your day?

Mine, not so good?

My feet are cold.

Don't ya hate having cold feet?

In addition to that.

I'm almost out of gin & tonic.

Which means I have to go to the store and buy some.

Damn!

That means I have to get dressed first.

And that means I have to shower.

It wouldn't be right to put clean clothes on if I don't shower first.

As long I'm going to shower I might as well shave.

I hate shaving.

Maybe I'll grow a beard.

Naw, that would take too long to grow.

And I'd be all scratchy and shit for too long.

Lori complains when I'm all scratchy faced.

And that's not good.

Lori doesn't want to snuggle so close when I'm scratchy.

And you know how much I like my snuggling?

Speaking of Lori.

She ordered a pair of boots she wanted over the weekend.

I agreed to buy them for her if she gave me...........

Wait!

I'd better not tell you that.

She'd kill me if I told you what she promised to give me.

But it's really, really good.

So if I have a scratchy face.

Lori wouldn't want to snuggle so close.

That means she won't give me what she agreed to give me.

And I really want that.

So I guess I'll shave.

As long as I'm going to shave

I might as well shower too.

But then I have to get dressed.

And I like lounging around in my bathrobe.

But I have to get dressed so I can go to the store.

Because I'm almost out of gin & tonic.

But I don't want to go out.

And I don't want to shower.

Or shave.

Or get dressed.

But showering will make my feet warm.

And I really want what Lori promised me.

If I bought her the boots.

So I better go get the gin & tonic.

That solves everything.

Yep.

Getting gin & tonic solves everything.

I feel better now.

So how's your day?

8 comments:

TUG said...

I can always count on you for a good laugh. Do we get to guess what Lori gave you? In my perverted mind I'm thinking of something that starts with a B and ends with a J ;)

What kind of gin do you like? I used to be a gin and tonic guy. Then I moved on to vodka.

BTExpress said...

Nope, I'm not talking. I don't want to risk not getting it.

Fabulous Me said...

My day was great until my boss paid me a visit this evening...

*rolls eyes*

Have a gin & tonic for me. And enjoy the top secret present you're expecting from Lori... ;)

jillie said...

DAMN! I'm getting thirsty just reading that.

Maybe Lori will do a HNT in her new boots??

SIMPLY ME said...

so you better take a shower.....

and warm your feet up so they don't make my body cold when we snuggle....

and when u take your shower, you better shave really close.....

so you won't be too scratchy when we get close to snuggle.....

and pour me a gin and tonic so...

after you shower and you get warm feet, and you have a close shave and I give you your "special" thank you as we snuggle.....

we can toast to it!

Patti said...

You've been reading "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie" again haven't you? LOL

BTExpress said...

Patti - No, I never heard the story, but I'll have to look it up.

Libby said...

hey, tony, liked the story of how gin & tonic leads to happiness (at least that's the moral of the story i got!)