Monday, July 18, 2005

My Nephew is Going to Have a Baby

Well, not him exactly, his wife. She's expecting next March. Wow, nice, uh? Not so fast. They just got married on April frigging 23rd. Yeah right, about 2 1/2 months ago. I'm still in shock!

Here's the story.

Kathy came over this past Saturday for a visit and told us that Ad and Mel are going to have a baby. (Now I know why she came over) Barbara's first words were, "Oh wow." Mine were, "Umh fsi...humada, humada, huimada....the....uh....they're...holy...their...huh?" I swear, I couldn't speak. I just stood there mumbling like a mute for something like 15 seconds.

Kathy just smiled. You could tell she was forcing it, because I've seen that smile plenty of times in the past 35 years.

"Uh, wow. Why so quick?" I asked.

"She is 29 you know, did you know that she was older than Ad?"

I shook my head no.

"I guess the maternal urge has hit her. Wayne was shocked." (Kathy's husband)

"What about you?" I asked.

Again the forced smile, with "I'm going to be a grandmother. Can you believe it? A grandmother."

I just smiled and didn't ask her anything else, because I knew she was unhappy, so I just said, "Well, congratulate them for me, ok?"

I went back to the computer and Kathy spent a little more time visiting with Barbara.

Then I started doing the math. "Baby due next March. March plus three equals June. They get married on April 23rd and gets pregnant two months later. That's right, whole fucking two months. WTF were they thinking. They are going to have enough trouble adjusting to just being married, and now they're going have a baby. Idiots.

Then it dawns on me. My brother got married something like six months after he met Diane. She also got pregnant right away. After she had the baby, it wasn't two years before she took the kid and walked out on him. Yeah, he was an idiot too.

11 comments:

Toaster said...

I know how you feel. Our friend Andy had his Creationist wife convince him that if the Lord's plan is to have her become pregnant and then that's what it'll be. So they went off birth control and got pregnant in about 2 months. We made fun of that around Christmas that time and bought him a pair of baby booties that he tried to burn over a candle and two months later ...

Now that's something the baby should never find out about.

Thanks for the hint-hint-nudge-nudge. You're like that Monty Python sketch about that man's wife :D

BTExpress said...

bunny: My son had a sitter when he was a baby that had 11 children. I guess the Lord wanted her to have children too.

I love Monty Python. Good to see there are still fans around.

Remember to give your neighbor sympathy when they get bombarded. It helps to distract them from blaming you. Now not that I have any first hand experience with this.

Chase North: I just think a couple should wait and make sure the relationship is going to last before having children. Now in your case, it looks like I would be proved wrong since you are in college and all. I hope my nephew shows me my concern is unwarranted.

Anonymous said...

Hey I had kids when I was young, 20, and it has worked out great. I think I was one of the lucky ones though. It wasn't easy, he was in the Army, but we made it. Anyway I guess my point is, its not the age its the dedication to your family that makes you a good parent.
So you like my legs huh?
LL

BTExpress said...

I don't think age is really the factor, but 20 is very young in any case. I think it has more to do with how long a couple has been together, and how soon after they get married that they have the baby. My nephew hasn't known the girl for two years yet, and now a baby. Idiot.

BTExpress said...

And yes LL, I like your legs. You have beautiful legs.

Anonymous said...

LOL! I hope you are doing ok bte...you ARE handsome...LOL...just didn't want to be so bold...
HAHAHAHAAHAHA....you know...I'm shy about these things.

ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR....LOL
LM

Anonymous said...

you know...i am so screwy tonight...I can't even find my own blog...LOLOL!
Just plain Mary..

Anonymous said...

Don't know if I will ever be ok...really...

But honestly...I am worryin' about you. You haven't posted..what does that mean? I don't know.

I hope it's not a bad thing.

Praying for you and yours bte!
Mary

Anonymous said...

LOVE THE FINAL LINE:

"yeah, he was an idiot too"

cycles they repeat, just like the wash.

Anonymous said...

Glad you liked my leg shot!
Thinking about doing a football themed HNT this week!
Check back with me!

BTExpress said...

That's a great idea, how original. I don't think I've seen that one before. I'll look forward to the shot. Any hints what your going to do with the football?

BTW, nice to see you here. :)